How Slow Can You Go?

I think it’s safe to say that most countries run with a definitive sense of “time.” Offices and businesses run on a schedule. Life is hectic and often stress filled. Meanwhile, life in Jamaica is generally slower and simply moves at a different pace. It can take some getting used to, but I’ve come to realize that losing the constraints of “time” can actually improve life. Do you think you could make the adjustment?

Now, I know that I often mention the “slow pace of life” in Jamaica, but it’s really hard to describe accurately. I think you almost have to live it to understand.

If you don’t adjust, it can make you feel angry and irritated. Get into the rhythm, though, and you can feel completely free because of it. It all depends on expectations and perceptions.

My previous life in New Hampshire was known for being insanely high-speed, even though I lived “the country life.” I had run my own goat farm and cheese business for 22 years while raising and home educating my 10 children. During part of that time, I also worked off-farm jobs. My kids were in all sorts of sports, lessons, etc, and I did my share of driving them around, too.

Still, it wasn’t like I was moving to Jamaica from New York City , Los Angeles or Washington DC. In my own mind, I already had a slow life comparatively speaking. Seeing just how slow life could actually be in Jamaica honestly took me by surprise.

I remember being a teenager in the Washington DC area. By my senior year of high school, I was attending half-days at school, working nearly 40 hours per week AND taking college classes.

In my “spare time,” I fit in parties, games, concerts and all of the other activities that go along with being a teenager. The pace of life was dizzying, but it was “the norm” there.

We moved to Naples, Italy the summer after I graduated from high school. The pace of life was so slow by comparison that I didn’t know quite what to do with myself. The lack of activity actually made me feel anxious at first. In fact, I ended up volunteering at the military dental clinic as a dental assistant just to fill the time. Can you imagine?

Yes, I had friends and we were traveling all over. I dated a lot, both Italians and the plethora of sailors coming into port. There were still all of the mundane daily things of life that had to be done, like laundry and cleaning. But, even as a kid, just hanging around by the pool or going to the beach didn’t feel like I was doing “enough.” I had this nagging feeling that I had to be busy.

I had forgotten what that long ago, very slow pace felt like until I started living in Jamaica.

Oh sure, the first few weeks were amazing. I sat on the veranda for literally hours each day. My friendly landlady was there with me. She knows everyone in town so we had plenty of company.

After a few weeks, that was wearing on me. I began to wonder how one ever learns to “sit” so much. It wasn’t just the sitting or standing around chatting that left me agitated.

It was that every single thing I attempted to do seemed to take ten times the amount of time it would normally take.I sometimes describe it as feeling like I’m slogging through wet cement with huge rubber boots on…with snowshoes attached to the boots.  A perfect example of this would be when I had a bathroom redone.  You can read about it here.

The interesting thing is that I have realized I can control how it makes me feel, based on managing my own expectations.

Of course, like most things in life, I’ve learned this lesson the hard way. I made myself crazy first and learned to relax and just go with the flow later.

For example, one day a while back, some Jamaican friends of mine called me to say they were at the café across the street. They asked if I’d come visit with them while they ate breakfast and “woke up.” It was about 11:00 AM.

When I sat down, they queried me as to why my hair was wet. I explained that I’d been down to the beach for a swim after my walk. They quipped, “Oh, did you enjoy your early morning swim?” Early morning? 10 AM is early morning? On Jamaican time, yes, my friends, that’s early.

My friends asked what I had planned for my day, going on to explain that they had rented a car for the day. They wanted to know if I’d like to “go to town” with them. Excited to do something different, I agreed to go and went back to my house to get ready. They said that they would call me when the car arrived.

I quickly showered, pulled my hair up, got dressed and gathered my things. And then I waited. And waited. And waited some more.

Knowing that I needed to get some local currency before we left, I decided to walk on down to the ATM while I “waited.” Worried that they might stop by my house and miss me, I decided to call and check-in on my way down. It was about 2:30 PM.

I was told that the rental car had not yet been returned by the previous customer. They suggested that I come hang out with them at a little watering hole by the beach. Finally, at 4 PM, no car in sight, I gave up and went back to my house. My friends assured me that they’d call me if the car arrived in short order. I never heard from them all night.

When I ran into one of them the next morning, I was told that the car was finally delivered late that night. Seems the previous renter was in no hurry to return and had no concern for the next person in line. This is how it often goes.

To my Jamaican friends, this is such a common sort of experience that having to roll with the punches is second nature to them. My friends weren’t freaking out or calling and complaining. They just looked at it as a nice reprieve from the normal flow of life, chilling out with a few drinks.

Whether it’s waiting for a rental car, or the painter, or the electrician, you will have to master the art of patience to live in Jamaica. I’ve come to determine that, among other things, Jamaicans, in general, do not have an internal clock. There are two times of day…nighttime and daytime.

They don’t generally run their lives around an external clock either. In fact, I don’t see churches with clock towers or even too many time pieces on the walls of offices or businesses. As slow as service tends to be, I’m guessing it’s set up that way intentionally.

When I taught cheese making classes at the Women’s Center here years ago, the students were told that class started at 9:30 AM. Meanwhile, I was instructed to plan to actually start class closer to 11 AM.

They called it being on “Jamaican time,” which translates into “nobody lets the clock rule their life.”  Most of us would also say it means, “they are usually late.”

Now, before my Jamaican readers jump all over me, there ARE the occasional exceptions to this rule. Big city life, as in Kingston, is totally different. People are rushing around and life is hectic. The offices I’ve dealt with there ran within stellar timeframes. It felt like I could have been anywhere in the time-oriented world.

And, yes, if we are talking about a driver who stands to make a $100-200 US, you can bet that he WILL be on time. I’m certain there are many professionals…teachers, bankers, etc…who DO show up at the expected hour, even out in the country.

However, I will also say that I’ve grown old waiting for business meetings to start. I’ve waited outside the door of a cell phone store in a mall in a major city that was supposed to open at 9 AM. The employees shuffled in at nearly 10 AM.

Please don’t mistakenly think that I’m proclaiming that the Jamaicans are “wrong.”

Nor am I suggesting that the “by the clock” people of the world are right. It’s just different. And I like it. In fact, if anything, I prefer it. I would even go so far as to say it’s a much healthier way to live, if you can mentally make the shift.

People who don’t race through their day, jumping from task to task as quickly as possible, probably live longer. They don’t stress themselves out about being someplace at an exact time. I have often wondered if it’s not part of the reason why Jamaicans tend to look years younger than they actually are.

So, how DOES one make this transition from a schedule oriented life to the complete opposite?

Good question! Here’s my best solution. I leave my fancy Apple watch at home in New Hampshire. Nor do I have clocks in my house in Jamaica except my phone. In general, I have no idea what time it is while I’m in Jamaica, other than, you guessed it, daytime or nighttime.

Leaving “time” behind, I’m amazed at how much more relaxed I am. The more relaxed I am, the better I sleep, think and feel. When I go out for my morning walk, I don’t feel guilty taking the time to stop and chat with my friends around town because I don’t see the minutes clicking by.

No, I still don’t physically enjoy just sitting around but I do things when I WANT to do them. I get up when I’m rested. Meals are eaten when I get hungry. I go to bed when I’m tired. Taking the time to walk more slowly, I see more beauty.

I honestly think that living without a watch or clock has made me a better person. My anxiety levels go way down and I simply enjoy each moment more. My relationships are so much stronger, too, because time is spent investing in them. I would submit that you might enjoy it as well. How slow can YOU go? You might be surprised!

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